r/WhitePeopleTwitter • u/SmashNLaughs • 11d ago
Mrs. DeBlasio is a legend
[removed] — view removed post
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u/HexManiacMarie 10d ago
I remember there was an anonymous question box and we were all required to insert small pieces of papers into it so we wouldn’t know who asked questions. I was the only one to ask a question and the whole class, and the teacher, laughed. I believe the teacher did answer it after, and I don’t remember the question in the first place, but i will always remember the feeling of betrayal.
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u/iLikeMangosteens 10d ago
We had a male sub who had the unfortunate job of showing how to apply spermicidal foam to a diaphragm. Obviously had never tried it before. The foam was in an aerosol can. When he triggered the can, the foam shot in the air and landed on his bald head.
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u/zer0gab 10d ago
First sex ed class... the teacher tried the traditional condom on the cucumber amd somehow messed up the installation. The condom instead of rolling down went flying and landed straight into the cleavage of a student in the first row. The class exploded into laughter and the teacher got right back to trying again. The second one tore after an inch. It took her two more tries before she finally managed to roll a condom dow the freaking cucumber.
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u/Feature_Agitated 10d ago
A kid passed out when we were watching a movie for Sex Ed. The movie was only describing something when he passed out. It hadn’t shown anything graphic
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u/Swansongz24 10d ago
In grade 7 a girl asked the teacher if "she could have her cherry popped by getting finger blasted" promptly removed from class to speak privately lol
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u/Imkindofslow 10d ago
It should never be a reason to pressure someone into sex but if that problem wasn't real condoms wouldn't come in different sizes in the first place. Different brands are in fact different sizes.
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u/Abnormal-Normal 10d ago
Literally just “Yes Mrs. [redacted] is going to say penis. Let’s all laugh about it now to get it out of our systems, then no more laughing about it okay?”
Then we laughed for a couple minutes and went along with it
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u/Alatar_Blue 10d ago
We read "they" differently, I thought the penis was the too small thing in that sentence, not the condom.
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u/ClarenceBirdfrost 10d ago
I remember watching a video of Pauley Shore teaching us how to put on a condom.
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u/TheBoisterousBoy 10d ago
Alright.
While that statement is utter bullshit, the “I can’t wear condoms” thing, not every condom is made to fit the same size dong.
I cannot wear normal sized condoms. If I do, there’s a 95% chance they will break. They’re uncomfortable, way too tight, and they make my little dude look like he’s a packaged sausage ready to burst at the seams.
Larger sized condoms fit significantly better. They don’t break nearly as often, I can actually feel things going on, and my mini-me can actually “breathe” and not be strangled.
So while I agree that there’s no real excuse to not wear a condom, just because you can wrap one around your head doesn’t mean they all fit the same.
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u/Accentu 10d ago
I attended an all-boys high school. I remember my health teacher specifically calling me out for some reason when we were learning about condom usage, and was like "alright Accentu, now which dick do you want?" in regards to the plastic dicks they had to show proper usage.
I ended up with the Frankenstein that had a brown base and white dick, so the other kids called it biracial.
High school was a weird time.
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u/kirby056 10d ago
We had a sink in our room in 5th grade. To the point of OOP, the teacher put a condom over the faucet and the condom held enough water to fill the sink. It burst when it hit a rough edge on the drain with probably 25L of water in it. If your penis is that big, you seriously need medical intervention.
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u/No_Gur6092 10d ago
Yeah Miss Kobasik face red as a beet. First ever class in 1965-ish, grade 8 I think.
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u/Content-Scallion-591 10d ago
A girl raised her hand and asked, "If you've just gotten your period, can you still get pregnant?" Two teachers just looked at each other and then one said, "Well, I think if you have just got your period you're too young to have sex."
The girl was obviously asking if a period just started, and they were so dismissive and didn't answer the question anyway.
I have this permanently stuck in my head, along with being accused of cheating when I absolutely didn't, as when I started to become disillusioned regarding my teachers.
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u/EatTheLiver 10d ago
I asked if you could have more than one orgasam and everyone laughed. I don’t think I even knew what an orgasam was at that time.
At a drug awareness assembly I asked if they put LSD in Chinese food. Also got a good laugh. What I’m trying to say is I’m stupid.
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u/LeonardoDiPugrio 10d ago
I did have a friend who claimed HE was too small to wear a condom, and he was 100% right. We hired an escort for him to lose his virginity at age 21 and let’s just say there was a bit of a scuffle when something went missing inside another thing.
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u/This_is_my_phone_tho 10d ago
How fucking hard is it to tell students different sizes of condoms exist? You can shove your hand in a x small condom, try putting it on your dick and having swx with it.
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u/egwynona 10d ago
In high school our sex ed teacher went to the store and bought one of every type of contraception product available to show us… while wearing a jacket that clearly proclaimed him as the track coach at our school. The cashier told him to have a nice day and he responded “Oh I WILL” and I will always feel bad for that traumatized cashier, but I learned a lot about safe sex
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u/eldena_frog 10d ago
Our teacher brought a big fucking dildo and told us to put a condom over it.
Thing was as big as my forearm.
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u/Nightmare2828 10d ago
She said we had to wear a condom for a blowjob. To this day I cant imagine how terrible that must be for both partners lol.
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u/Careless-Sherbet-606 10d ago
As a guy who is a bit bigger this infuriates me. A normal sized condoms squeezes the life out of it, not to mention the red/blue welt that stays for atleast a week! Its becouse of dumb horsesht like this i thought for YEARS that I was doing something wrong!
So to any girl saying that condoms are a one size fits all, first, you need to go out more!. And second, condoms are like bra's, if they dont feel right; you got the wrong one!
To paint a picture, this is kinda what a unrolled condom on me looks like (not nsfw) https://images.app.goo.gl/sKaF6F5QrXSHYftU7
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u/Several-Signature583 10d ago
Went to catholic school and in 6th grade we had sex ex taught to us by one of the priests and we were separated into boys and girls. That was weird in and of itself, but 2 minutes into it he started talking about how your penis just reacts to stimuli and if you were in a room blindfolded and someone came in and started touching it or doing stuff to it, it wouldn’t matter if it was a man or a woman, your body would just react and you would enjoy it. Not surprisingly, he was later arrested for molesting altar boys. No joke.
edit: this was in 1986 and he was arrested in 1999 after being moved around parishes after accusations came out in 1989.
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u/Snagatron 10d ago
Mrs DeBlasio would have had a special time in German schools. Because DeBlasio could've seen as DeFelacio (German blasen = blasio in childish).
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u/identicalBadger 10d ago
In 7th or 8th grade sex ed, someone asked if you could contract HIV from kissing. The teacher was like “there’s trace amounts in saliva so yeah, if you drank a gallon you could become infected”. Some kid in the back of the room blurts out “that’s a really long kiss!” and the entire class broke out in laughter.
RIP Ryan
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u/ravenclaw1991 10d ago
We were forced to watch 40 Year Old Virgin in class to basically “prove” it was okay to remain a virgin. They really tried to tell you to not have sex. Best part? We were 14 and there was already a girl in the class that was pregnant and ready to give birth at any time. Little late for her.
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u/ravenclaw1991 10d ago
We were forced to watch 40 Year Old Virgin in class to basically “prove” it was okay to remain a virgin. They really tried to tell you to not have sex. Best part? We were 14 and there was already a girl in the class that was pregnant and ready to give birth at any time. Little late for her.
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u/ChampionshipStock870 10d ago
My first sex Ed class came in catholic school when we were in eighth grade. In typical catholic fashion their idea of sex Ed in 1993 consisted of showing us videos of abortions and the aftermath of teenage child birth.
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u/Apathy_Poster_Child 10d ago
Just because you can blow it up doesn't mean it can't be too tight. When it's too tight it kills your erection.
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u/UraniumRocker 10d ago
My health teacher did the same thing. It’s the thing I remember mistakenly about health class. It was pretty funny at the time
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u/Grimsterr 10d ago
I once put one over the garden hose and filled it with water until it burst. It got HUGE, like 5 gallon bucket huge, before it finally split.
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u/Windmillskillbirds 10d ago
The cheerleading coach was our sex Ed teacher, she had 3 kids by 3 dads. This was in kind of rural Alabama so we got taught things like:
how women will always remember and possibly love the person who took her virginity
Women get looser the more partners the sleep with
Anal can't prevent pregnancy so don't do it
Men think about sex every 5 seconds (don't remember the amount of time but something like that)
Not being shown anything relating to a condom
The video about STDs with all the fucked up people in it
The steps to turn on a woman (this one was kinda weird but I still use it and never had a complaint)
There was some weird stuff with this but I remember something about men not having to give head to women
That all gay sex leads to aids no matter what
This was in 2009 or so.
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u/GypsyDishwasher 10d ago
Starting in Grade 9 they had an actual nurse come in to teach us sex ed, as that was when they started teaching us more than a 45 minute talk about how we were gonna start growing hair down there.
Invited everyone to submit anonymous questions at the end of each class and that she'd answer them at the end of the week. Said so long as we used the proper medical terms for stuff and didn't use anyone's name, she'd read whatever was submitted.
And true to her word, she did. Her laughing when someone (I know it was you, Rob) asked "If my penis is bent 60 degrees to the left, is that too much, too little or just enough?" and then earnestly answering with "So long as you and your partner are comfortable with it, it doesn't matter," really endeared her to us.
Set the standard for sex ed for the rest of high school that none of the other nurses who came in could match because none of them were that brave.
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u/aerial_ruin 10d ago
We're going back over thirty years ago now, but I remember a story about a back street abortion.
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u/barbatos087 10d ago
I remember my first sex Ed class in elementary school, I wasn't even paying attention, just sitting on the floor looking out the open door and thinking about nothing.
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u/50DuckSizedHorses 10d ago
I remember there was a bucket or hat and the teacher said “You can write whatever question you want, that maybe you’re too nervous to ask, and put it in the hat. I will pull out each question and read it and everyone’s questions will be answered to the group.”
She then proceeded to pull out folded pieces of paper, read them to herself first, and then under her breath say something like “nope, not that one” and threw them away one by one. Out of 30 or so questions she threw out probably 25.
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u/tj_haine 10d ago
The only thing that I really remember is mishearing anti natal and Aunty Mabel and getting quite confused.
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u/lydocia 10d ago
I'm Dutch, STD translated in Dutch is SOA, with the "o" meaning "overdraagbaar", 'transmittable', but it looks a lot like "onverdraagbaar", which means 'intolerable'. Nobody in my class had ANY clue when they asked questions like how do you get pregnant or what does STD mean, so when I answered and misspoke, and accidentally said "sexually intolerable disease", I was MADE FUN OF by the adults (not the kids, they didn't know better). So yeah, memorable.
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u/Wonderful_Pickle_752 10d ago
My friend asked the teacher if you could have sex on a motorcycle. He said, "Yes... as long as it's not moving."
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u/MammothCat1 10d ago
Our sex Ed was once in middle school. I think sixth grade?
The nurse, a male, had us boys and explained the basics. Then he told all of us that we can't lie about "not fitting". As he was in the design team for Trojan trying to make the best condom, then pulled your average condom over his shoe to his shins.
I have never forgotten this. The Internet helps keep the safe sex in line but that demonstration? That is what I'll use when my kids get older.
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u/KlenDahthII 10d ago
Mrs DeBlasio probably inadvertently got a few girls knocked up via that demonstration. Condom’s absolutely can be too small - and using the right size is the majority of “proper use” to give them a high efficacy..
You can stretch is much further than the size of a penis - and in doing so compromise the structural integrity. That belief is how you end up with a split condom and a whoopsie baby.
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u/Trace_Reading 10d ago
I was in a school with smaller class sizes (don't ask), but the students were remarkably mature about everything. Hardly anyone was cracking jokes.
(the curriculum also pushed that late 90s/early 2000s BS that the safest sex is not having sex at all, which is, as noted, BS.)
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u/DameKumquat 10d ago
Being at an all-girls boarding school, and it being the height of the AIDS crisis, they were a bit obsessed with sex ed. So apart from everything covered in Science and what they called PSME (Personal, Social, Health Education), we also got a whole year of lessons on contraception, in RE (Religious Education...)
This included way too many anecdotes from our teacher, including the effect of vasectomy on her husband (recovered to full firmness within a week, fully functional, does now bend a little to the right, seeing as you ask)
Of course her husband turned up to some event and asked "So, what has she been saying about me?" I went red and had to fake a coughing fit and run.
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u/JPVsTheEvilDead 10d ago
Welp, there is a caveat to this; normal condoms that dont fit well, so to say, actually kinda hurt and are really uncomfortable to wear.
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u/RandomZach86 10d ago
As a guy who normally doesnt fit normal condoms.. idk where she got that giant one at lol. I get the size large, but idk if they stretch that big.. then again, Ive never tried hahahaha
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u/Matman161 10d ago
Yeah but the condom needs to be the right size. You can stretch most condoms around your head or your foot, but now trying doing it with the most sensitive skin on your body on an organ that needs to stay inflated. It's really uncomfortable to try and put on on that's too small.
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u/cloudit305 10d ago
I had a teacher's aid that would never talk. This was in algebra 2. One day our teacher had to step out due to personal reasons. The aid finally started to speak. The first thing she did was warn every girl in the class about how men lie and to be weary of men everywhere. She went on to explain about how she had a chance to kill her ex-husband as he slept on the couch with a knife in her hand. Everyone was in shock. She didn't last too long after that.
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u/form_an_opinion 10d ago
Well I always struggled with them in my dating days because they cut off circulation down there and killed my arousal. I didn't know or learn until much later that the size differences of the larger versions accounted for thickness and not length.. Because in my dumb brain back then I thought those were just longer, not wider.
She could probably fit one over her head, but if she left it there she wouldn't feel great after a short time.
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u/Jai137 10d ago
My memorable Sex Ed moment was when someone asked if diseases could be spread by oral sex, which shocked the instructor and asked what did he mean by that. To which the guy said “kissing with the tongues intertwined”. The instructor basically answered that diseases could be spread that way, but that wasn’t what oral sex was. And then he explained what it was, surprising the entire class.
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u/itzPenbar 10d ago
A great way to tell everyone you dont have a penis. Condoms can very well be too small.
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u/TheMattAttack 10d ago
I think I got sex-ed in 8th grade or so, which is around 2008 in southern TN.
Got to see a bunch of horrible pictures of STDs and infections, then got lectured that we shouldn't be worrying about that anyways, since pre-marital sex is forbidden and you'll go to hell or whatever. Didn't learn a god damn thing.
I am glad Google and such was around when I was 17 and got Chlamydia for the first time. Barely learned about contraceptives, at least not until college.
Well, now I'm five years married and recently found out I'm infertile, so I guess I spent a whole lot of years worrying for nothing so that's a silver lining.
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u/ShrimpCrackers 10d ago
"No, hun, I didn't mean the condoms are too small, I mean I'm too small! Do you have a thimble? That'll help me be bigger."
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u/Immediate_Cover_945 10d ago
Some teachers go the extra mile 😉 and no..not referring to the one's that tried to sleep with us!!
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u/Vodoe 10d ago
Its always a woman talking about condoms in this way.
A condom can absolutely be too small to use without considerable pain, even if you can stretch it enough to wear over your face. The advice being given should be "hold your boundaries and do not have sex without a condom" and not "any man that tries to give you a reason other than what you already believe is a liar and he is just trying to get out his obligations to you".
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u/dirtyhappythoughts 10d ago
Yeah, honestly the more I hear this fable the more I feel it feeds into "men are just always ready to go" again.
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u/Thosam 10d ago
Here in Denmark you have ‘Uge 6’, the number 6 being pronounced ‘sex’ in Danish. A week of sex ed classes three times in the first nine school years, usually 0.-3., 4.-6., 7.-9. Very age appropriate, for 0.-3. f.ex. focus is a lot on what is sexual contact, what is sexual abuse, what is consent.
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u/wt_anonymous 10d ago
I honestly don't remember any notable stories from my sex ed classes. My first one was when I was like 9 and too young to understand or care about the topic. Then I had it again when I was 13 where the teacher was a nutjob and the kids were extremely fucking weird. Someone I had never spoken to asked me if I masturbated.
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u/Initial-Hawk-1161 10d ago
tbf a small condom is a problem. it is actually unpleasant and i've had them fall off too.
it can be a problem
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u/LordOfTheGerenuk 10d ago
We had two. One was Reid. He talked about consent, had the driest voice on the planet, and was funny as hell. He taught us a lot.
Then we had "Renee the Crazy Sex Ed Lady." We didn't call her that. She gave herself that title. All we "learned" from her is that she loves sex, but it's always terrible for girls and it will always be painful and unfun.
Guess which teacher we actually believed?
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u/Punching-cones 10d ago
I remember watching some video in the mid 90s, and in it, there’s a group of kids and a teacher and one kid goes “can I call it a boner?” And the teacher says “no,because theres no bone in it”. At which point me and my best friend burst out laughing and had to leave the classroom.
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u/B0neCh3wer 10d ago
I remember this kid was just asking ridiculous and absurd questions. For example "What happens if your balls get run over by a bulldozer". I think he was trying to be funny, but it was just incredibly grating and the nurse just got frustrated by the end of it.
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u/LoddyDoddee 10d ago
I remember asking what a douche was and the teacher got flustered and refused to tell me. What a stupid sex-ed class. Basically all they told us was that we would all be getting periods soon, that's all I learned.
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u/QuantumWarrior 10d ago
On the one hand you can stretch out any size of condom to cover your entire arm but if you're wearing the wrong size it will still feel tight and uncomfortable.
On the other hand they make condoms up to a pretty big size so anyone trying that excuse is either a liar or hasn't looked hard enough.
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u/NoOpinionsAllowedOnR 10d ago
Only thing I remember is her saying "And don't worry, you can't pee and ejaculate at the same time." And then she looked right at me in class and said, "I can tell you were worried about that." Like, what tf did I do?
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u/dirtythirty1864 10d ago
I remember my gym teacher gave us the big lecture, the day before. "The class is not 'sex ed.' We do not teach you how to have sex. The class is called 'Life Resource.' If you call it 'sex ed', you will be written up. Any snickering, laughing, commenting, joking, passing notes, whispering, messing around will be an instant write-up and a zero for the day."
The classes were separated by boys and girls. A man who looked to be at least 30, with perfect hair, skin, and teeth told us he was a meth addict for 10 years and in and out of prison before he found cause for sobriety, met his wife, and had kids. He then preached how much he regretted his past and how he so wished his wife was his first one and told us that it is so worth it to wait for "the one." We were shown various STD's and their effects, especially when untreated. We were told tales such as, "Condoms almost never work, and almost always break, you can't just rely on a condom." "Some sperm are powerful enough to survive the birth control pill and your partner can still get pregnant." "Even just cuddling, semen could seep through the clothing and into the woman, and cause her to be pregnant." "Unlike the vagina, the anus is not naturally suitable for sexual intercourse. So anal sex can heavily damage the anus and rectum, as well as cause some infections." And the infamous, "An STD will end your romantic life, as well as having any chance of a marriage life, forever. Yes, even HSV1 or 'the cold sore." Such bullshit that school fucked my brain over with.
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u/Chipotle2K 10d ago
Tbf it depends on the brand of condom, from experience, there was a brand that left me pretty sore during and bruised after from it trying to strangle my snake to death.
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u/LukesRightHandMan 10d ago
“Remember, girls: all men are basketball players. They always dribble before they shoot.”
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u/shiawase198 10d ago
I remember my teacher mentioning that if you licked a vagina, it would taste salty. I don't even remember the explanation for it. I just remember her saying this out of nowhere. I mean she was right but I feel like 12 years old was a little too soon to learn that.
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u/dabber808 10d ago
Is this really not just an urban legend passed down? Our HS health teacher “supposedly” did the same and then had to get help to cut it off her head. I never met anyone who had witnessed it firsthand but fully believed it until someone challenged my belief with the same question about urban legend. Still, a legend is a legend 😃
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u/FrikkinPositive 10d ago
Thing is, they do come with sizes and will be extremely uncomfortable and hard to use when too small or too big. In Thailand and Nepal I tried getting condoms and they were way too small for me. I tried putting them on but it was useless.
Believe me, I'd I could maneuver a condom over my dick in the same way you can do with two hands over your head, and then blow it up, I would! But using my sister's jacket as a wind sail doesn't prove that it would fit comfortably on my body.
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u/au5000 10d ago
A friend’s daughter was at a Catholic primary school. Age appropriate education was called Mitiog.
Driving with them in the car the kid pipes up … « in mitiog today … » I had no idea what that was … found the answer so funny I nearly drove off the road.
MITIOG - made in the image of God.
Jeez … literally 🤣. Apologies if this upsets those strong of faith.
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u/Amon-and-The-Fool 10d ago
I don't know about Mrs. Deblasio, but my dick is a lot more sensitive than my head.
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u/Accurate_Counter7465 10d ago
I’ve generally found the base ring of most condoms to be uncomfortably tight, even painful after prolonged periods. Even still, always rubber up! Better to have a temporary mark of the deed than an unwanted kid or some other nastiness.
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u/Late-Chip-5890 10d ago
That they separated the boys from the girls. So we got only half the education, and so did they
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u/Leprecon 10d ago
Honestly I kind of hate this. Any condom will fit, no mater how large your junk is. But in terms of enjoyment I do think we should emphasise that the condom can make a difference.
I have a larger than average penis, and the first time I had sex I put on a normal sized condom. It was a tight squeeze and honestly I didn't feel anything. I thought condoms suck and didn't like them. Then when I managed to get condoms that fit me sex felt so much better.
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u/Darolaho 10d ago
My sex ed consisted entirely of having a single "wait till marriage" talk in 7th grade. Other than that they just ignored it and expected parents to ignore their kids according to their own beliefs.
Although I went to Catholic school so not really surprising
Not my class but in highschool one of the senior classes a teacher tried to get his students write a paper on why pornography was evil. The teacher was promptly fired for that lmao
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u/Arch_0 10d ago
I assure you they can be too small. At university they gave out bags with various condoms of all shapes and sizes so people could find ones they liked. My girlfriend and I made our way through them because why not and eventually only had the smalls left. After some jokes being made I went to put it on and just couldn't. She helped but I was in a lot of pain. Managed to get it down but after a few seconds it felt let my dick was going to fall off. We didn't have sex that night. It wasn't worth it.
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u/KingLeo92 10d ago
I remember this absolute bombshell of a girl I went to class with that always wore a Tool shirt. I was head over heels for that girl. Where you at Grace?
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u/kayamar1 10d ago
I only remember that I was taught sex ed by Bruce Hart. Yes, as in the famous Hart wrestling family, and brother of Owen Hart.
It was weird.
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u/Shell-Game 10d ago
Our Religious Ed teacher took the boys only session, and began with the daring gambit of, 'So who is the hottest girl in your class? Would you bang her?'
Worrying enough, but then followed up with, 'Who's the ugliest girl in your class? Would you bang her with a bag over her head?'
I still think about this sometimes, late at night. Never worked out the relevancy...
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u/L1b3rtyPr1m3 10d ago
In Germany my first sex ed was in 3rd grade in the early 00s I believe. First it was the whole class together, where social workers did a few interactive "plays" that would help us identify sexual abuse, when someone was being inappropriate and that nobody, not even people we know, is allowed to touch us where we don't want to be touched. In hindsight the people they displayed were aunts, uncles and teachers. All trusted people with authority, I believe that was smart. Well except one which was "how to deal with a flasher and how to react".
Then they separated us into boys and girls so we could talk freely with our respective social worker. I remember it being great fun talking about all these prohibited things.
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u/analvorframe 10d ago
They're never too small when they're the only thing you have but larger ones exist for a reason -- the regular ones will stretch but they'll feel noticeably tighter especially around the base if you're thicker than long cause more of it is bunched up there. Still, in the absence of larger ones, use them anyways.
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u/NoConfidence5946 10d ago
I remember going with my ultra conservative Christian father because my mother was sick of going to them with the it
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u/Isburough 10d ago
she's both right and wrong. there is no dick too large for condoms, true, but there are too small condoms. they can cut circulation. Just because can physically be put over a dick, doesn't mean it fits. there are condom sizes for a reason...
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u/ellieofus 10d ago
My male teacher told us, an all female class, the same.
He said “do not believe them when they say they cannot wear one because it’s too small. It they say they’re allergic, there’s other types they can use. Don’t believe anything they say when they’re trying to pressure you into having sex.”
Really great man he was. I still remember him very fondly.
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u/jwwendell 10d ago
condoms can be too small, this woman clearly doesnt have a dick.
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u/caz- 10d ago
I mean this as a PSA, not a humble-brag
This myth is the main reason I never liked condoms when I was younger. I always assumed that was the most comfortable they could be, and ended up having unprotected sex rather than finding ones that fit.
Just because an anal sphinter can stretch over an eggplant doesn't mean it's comfortable, and just because a regular condom can stretch over a larger penis doesn't mean that's comfortable either.
There are condoms out there for every size, and we can teach girls to require boys to a condom, while alsoi teaching boys to understand their own body, which will lead to more boys making healthy sexual choices; they're not mutually exclusive.
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u/Affectionate_Bee1082 10d ago
Mine was DEFINITELY when they showed us gonorrhea in the eye, and one of the guy shouted "but wait how does it get in your eye?!" And our teacher stopped, looked at him, and said "have you seen the toilets in the boys bathroom?" He didn't ask anymore questions that day.
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u/oodelallie 10d ago
Tbf I picked up some honey flavoured (not important but yeah) condoms in Tokyo on holiday once and they were definitely too small, squeezed the life out of my poor lil guy.
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u/Goatbreath37 10d ago
Mine gave me a vanilla flavoured condom. I unfortunately didn't get to keep it as I moved out of my mom's trailer and didn't really bring a lot of stuff
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u/SelectPerception5 10d ago
Where I work, there is a department for a company that makes condoms. Whenever they are training a new group of employees, they always demonstrate how a condom can fit over a large boot. This demonstration is to show them that customers who call and complain that the condom doesn't fit are full of shit. However, each rep has to treat it as honest feedback and approach the conversation with maturity and seriousness as though the customer is telling the truth.
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u/felinedynamite 10d ago
We got student volunteers from student unions , they had a duty to go to schools across the city and tell kids about contraception, sex, sti, pregnancy and abortion. Also this being the early 2000 we were also told about HIV and the importance of safe sex. It was a good education now that I think back.
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u/VMK_1991 10d ago
Said as a member of sex that never had to wear one.
The "main" part may be stretchy, but the "ring" at the bottom can be too thick and thus cuts off the flow of blood.
Not to say that you shouldn't wear one and it's more of a question of finding the right brand for you, but this fucking comment reeks of ignorance on male anatomy. It is as if so called "Mrs. DeBlasio" never had sex before.
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u/Mello_Me_ 10d ago
And yet, Mrs. DeBlasio did manage to pull the "main part" AND the "ring" over her head.
I have to believe her head is wider than any human penis.
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u/VMK_1991 10d ago
Do you not know the difference between a head, that has a fucking skull, a thick structure composed of bones, and a penis, an organ made out of skin, vessels and tubes?
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u/Norka_III 10d ago
Then buy and bring your own, and never pressure your partner into having condom-less sex, that's the whole point
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u/VMK_1991 10d ago
No, the whole point of Mrs. DeBlasio "argument" is "all men are liars if they say this", which is, at best, signifier of a rudimentary knowledge of male anatomy or, at worst, open misandry.
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u/PerfectSemiconductor 10d ago
Just because condoms stretch doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel like it’s choking the life out of your dick lol
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u/HannaaaLucie 10d ago
I remember getting into a huge argument with my teacher. I refused to put a condom on the plastic penis, due to me being a lesbian and being adamant I will never need this knowledge.
Teacher said I had to do it else I fail the class, and my sexuality may change in the future and I'll need this knowledge.
I failed sex ed class, I'm also a 31 year old lesbian that has never needed the knowledge of how to use a condom.
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u/omgwow01 10d ago
I really hate the OP's picture, it screams of ignorance and no practical experience. Yes the condom "fits," but if the man is thick enough, it will strangle it and make it harder to perform, if performing is even possible at that point. It's like putting a small rubber band around your wrist, yes it will fit, but it will cut off circulation and you wont be able to use it. Likewise, we all know that when you first start off having sex, there is this "performance anxiety" factor, which makes it hard to get, well, hard. You add a tightly bound stranglehold squeezing the blood out of your manhood to the mix, you're chances of performing drops significantly.
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u/Defiant_Bed_1969 10d ago
Then, I cannot wear one because mine is so small it will just slip off. It is useless.
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u/Acceptable-Home1899 10d ago
I 100% believe this to be true. But I broke condoms all the time throughout my youth because I wasn’t using the right sized condom. I always thought magnum condoms were for the porn sized dicks, and I’m certainly not that. But when I changed to them, I never broke another one.
If they are able to stretch the size of a teacher’s head, why did this happen? (Not saying it can’t, just curious)
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u/finnblue23 10d ago
My sex ed teacher had the biggest boobs I’ve ever seen in my life. She used to rest a plate of food on her chest while teaching. I don’t remember anything about sexual education, but I’ll remember Ms. Booby Plate for the rest of my life.
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u/HugaM00S3 10d ago
School principal made me say the word testicles 20 times in front of the whole class, because I kept saying balls during 5th grade sex ed.
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u/Drezhar 10d ago
I remember my school unironically hired a famous local TV documentary presenter to give us sex ed. Mind you, it was around 2000 so not even close to the attention there is now on the topic. I will never forget this lady that I used to see on TV presenting documentaries explaining me how virginity works.
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u/NewClock8197 10d ago
Don’t floss your teeth before giving a blow job. This was late 80s HIV scare talk.
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u/Itstotallysafe 10d ago
I remember Mrs.E saying there'd be about a tablespoon of ejaculate and half a dozen of us guys arguing "oh there's way more than that!" Coed sex-ed was a blast.
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u/rhysdog1 10d ago
she probably should have used a dummy instead of her own head, but thank you anyway mrs deblasio
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u/a_lonely_trash_bag 10d ago
Catholic School "sex ed" here. All I really remember is the bouncy rubber fetus models that the lady from the local crisis pregnancy center gave to us. Really, what else would you expect to happen when you give rubber fetuses to ~25 middle schoolers? We were chucking those things at each other in the hallway. They were really unpredictable, too, due to their shape.
Apparently, we were the first class that she gave those to. We were also the last.
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u/Elite_AI 10d ago
Mrs DeBlasio is an absolute shithead.
I remember I always had difficulty wearing condoms. They pinched and hurt and I always got soft. I told my friend that maybe I should get larger ones and she said "what? No! It's a myth that men need larger condoms. My sex ed teacher told us so". So I just stopped using condoms. Why on Earth would I use condoms if they all hurt and made me soft?
It took a random ONS yelling at me to get larger condoms before I actually tried them and oh my God they don't hurt! And I stay hard! Wow! I can actually have safe sex now.
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u/Faulty_english 10d ago
My sex ed teacher told guys not to buy condoms that are too big because then the condom will not fit and both people will be disappointed. Then she zoned out for a minute like she was reliving a memory
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u/Nakatsukasa 10d ago
Mine, a male teacher, told the girls if a boy ever tell you he'll finish outside if you let him do without the condom, 9/10 he is either lying or overestimating himself
Condoms all the way y'all
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u/Flickeringcandles 10d ago
My health teacher told us that men can't pull out fast enough for that method to work.... but I think he was just telling on himself
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u/UpstairsAuthor9014 10d ago
You cant wear a condom because its small, I cant wear a condom because its too big. We are not the same
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u/That-Object6749 10d ago
I can't care for a sack of flour.
- Corollary, duct tape for wounds.
How to put a condom on a banana
That film on STD's.... Still traumatized. That was effective! Remember #2, and Pretty Woman was right... No kissing, you dirty freaks!
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u/Porcupinetrenchcoat 10d ago
Ugh. Shout out to Mr. Waters who couldn't say the word "penis" or "vagina" without getting full on red in the face mortified. Most useless teacher in the whole school.
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u/blac_sheep90 10d ago
It's a terrifying feeling be mid sex a feel a condom burst. It happened to me twice and it definitely put a damper on the mood.
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u/fairlyaveragetrader 10d ago
I remember my health teacher encouraging us never to use drugs but to have all the sex we possibly could. this was 8th grade. I've never used street drugs but I wasn't absolute gigolo during my teens and twenties. I still blame Mr matee 😂
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u/hwc000000 10d ago
Is there a tiktok of someone doing this so that girls can understand that "condoms are too small" is 100% bullshit?
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u/blinktheskater 10d ago
I remember the crazy warts on some dude…. Thanks for making me remember that….
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u/MBrett06 10d ago
I remember my sex ed teacher telling us that they lived next door to Dikembe Mutombo at Georgetown University. They then proceeded to describe "him" by using a clenched fist and the length of their forearm.
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u/AminMassoudi 10d ago
Mrs Deblasio never fucked someone with a big dick and she can go to hell.
This idiotic stupid misinformation made me think I was doing something wrong the first time I tried to use a condom and nearly gave up before realizing that I needed to buy bigger ones.
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u/sonofsonof 10d ago
This is Badmensanatomy. If female teachers are going to be teaching stuff like this, they should at least know there aren't bones in penises.
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u/OkSherbert2281 10d ago
My teacher was explaining different forms of birth control and the spermicide film came up. She explained that you wrap around your finger and insert it. A couple of girls said that was gross and ewww etc (we were 16/17) and the teacher flat out said “if you think putting your own finger inside you is gross then you’re probably better off waiting before you become sexually active”
Probably the single most important thing I remember from that class 🤷♀️🤣
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u/KnittingforHouselves 10d ago
That's damn perfect! My teacher had a similarly impact full response. "If you feel too ashamed to buy condoms at the store, you're not mature enough to have sex. Just imagine how embarrassed you'd feel having to buy a pregnancy test instead."
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u/SpatulaCity94 10d ago
Used to prove the same point by pulling a regular sized condom all the way up to my elbow. Ain't no way your dick is bigger than my forearm, wrap it up.
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u/Electrical_Resource6 10d ago
I had a sex ed teacher get asked "why don't guys just pull out" and she says "I've never met a guy that could". Magic lady bits apparently...
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u/ShadoeLandman 10d ago
They told us we’d get periods and showed a tiny panty liner, but I had already gotten my period and thought I was a freak because I had a heavy period and couldn’t just use a tiny liner pad. They said we’d probably see a little spot first, but I just suddenly started flowing full force the night before family vacation.
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u/comox 10d ago
A couple memories from sex ed class back in 1983:
1 The sex ed teacher was named Mrs Dick.
2 One week Mrs Dick was sick so the gym teacher was called in to sub for her. Instead of trying to teach the materials he rented Rambo First Blood on VHS tape and we watched it over 2 classes. Probably not the best choice for a class full of 13 year olds, but the gym teacher was a fucking idiot.
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u/Yotsubauniverse 10d ago
I remember the irony of my Catholic teacher being the one that gave us the most accurate and detailed lesson about contraception. And it was also the best class we had.
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u/Historical-Gap-7084 10d ago
I wish I'd had someone to tell me that as a young woman. It would have saved me a lot heartache.
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u/BerryGrapeBeard 10d ago
In middle school a buddy of mine put a dildo on his forehead in sex ed and yelled, “Look I’m a unicorn!”
To which, our sex ed responded, “no, you’re a dickhead.”
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u/PreNamLtDan 10d ago
I don't remember her name but she did tell us magnum condoms are BS and then opened up a normal one and stretched it out so it fit up to her elbow. That and the pictures of STDs.
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u/Mrofcourse 10d ago
I remember they passed around fake silicone ball sacks so you could feel what a lump would feel like. One kid took the largest one and slapped the shit out of another kid with that big fake nut sack.
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u/Illustrious_Dan4728 10d ago
I remember the nurse/teacher taking the wooden dildo and banging it against the desk for some reason. I can't remember the reason, but I remember the thwack thwack thwack the wood made. It was so strange.
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u/BlyStreetMusic 10d ago
Mrs. DeBlasio never spent the last 25 minutes of a first date, 3 knuckles deep in a stranger.. Trying to fish out a too small condom that got lost in action.
This horror repeated serval times before a girl bought condoms for me and came home with the gold. I had no idea. Game changer.
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u/WankerBott 10d ago
our segregated sex ed class was a video tape played by the baseball coach showing all the nasty STDs...then a Preacher explained what hell was, then the Coach explained abstinence...
it was 1 day of health class...for 90 minutes...of one semester...11 kids had been opted out of it by their parents.
Gotta love the bible belt
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